


Tension

by nanuk_dain



Series: Impossible Relationships [8]
Category: Generation Kill
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-20
Updated: 2011-12-20
Packaged: 2017-10-27 14:46:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 822
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/296988
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nanuk_dain/pseuds/nanuk_dain
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ray reaches his limits.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tension

  
[   
](http://pics.livejournal.com/nanuk_dain/pic/000be3gq)   


 

Tim watched Ray. He had watched him for weeks, but now he saw things he hadn't seen before.

Ray _wanted_ him, and Tim was astonished how easy it was for him to read that in every gaze, every movement, every word Ray directed at him. At the same time he was pretty sure nobody else noticed, because Ray kept his mask firmly in place. Tim only saw it because he knew what to look for, because he knew Ray without his mask, because he had a weird kind of sixth sense when it came to Ray. It made it incredibly hard to remain professional, to keep his distance when all he wanted was to devour Ray right there and then. Instead, their contact was even more limited than it had been before that night in the power plant, but it wasn't due to them trying to be careful. It was because there was just no opportunity to exchange even a few words. They were busy all the time, patrolling through countless neighbourhoods, rarely coming to the same one twice.

The city wore on Ray, the whole insanity of this war affected him, and it began to show now that he was off Ripped Fuel. The camp south of Baghdad was the worst, though. Tim could _see_ Ray grow more unsettled, more tense and volatile with every day that passed. Ray tried to hide it, but Tim could tell he didn't manage to fool everybody. There were cracks in his façade, and several people noticed. Tim was sure that Brad did, and Hasser, too. Even the Reporter seemed to pick up on it, but he wisely refrained from saying anything.

Tim had suspected for a while that the enforced distance between him and Ray only added to the strain, and ever since Ray had pulled him aside in the soccer stadium, had kissed him with an urgency that had been palpable, he knew it for certain. For those few minutes that he had Ray pressed against the wall, all tension and despair had seemed to leave him, he had only been focussed on Tim, on their closeness, on what they'd been doing. Leaving Ray alone in that office had been one of the most difficult things Tim had ever had to do. He'd known that it was the only right thing to do, but that hadn't made it any easier.

He'd been _so close_ to turning back.

Ever since, Ray had become more and more tense and Tim kept a close eye on him, worried how it would end. He had no doubt that Ray couldn't go on like that much longer. The level of suppressed emotions, of tension and restlessness was bound to find an outlet sooner or later, and it wouldn't be nice. Tim tried to stay in sight of Ray so that he could intervene should it become necessary. He was aware of Brad doing the same thing, both of them felt that the final explosion was coming closer.

They left for the military base near Ad Diwaniyah after a few days, and Tim couldn't help being relieved that Ray had kept it together. For a while he even wondered if he'd been wrong about Ray's state of mind when Poke and Ray came by and asked him and a few other guys to play football. On the field, Ray seemed to use the game to let off some steam, but he otherwise appeared to be okay. He was even back to ranting, and that was a good sign. Tim watched from the sidelines where he stood with some of the other guys, waiting to get back into the game.

At some point, Rudy tackled Ray and threw him to the ground. It was nothing out of the ordinary for the game, but it turned ugly pretty quickly. Ray exploded in a fit of violence, angry shouts and mindless rage. Rudy was physically superior to almost all of them and he was one of the best fighters Tim had ever met. Attacking him was stupid, everybody knew that, but Ray's common sense had totally blacked out. On top of that, Rudy's usually tight restraints seemed to have snapped because it was obvious that he used his strength and his skill to hurt Ray for real.

The guys were quick to react, it was obvious that this wasn't a fight for fun. Before Tim could reach them, Rudy and Ray had been separated. Mike had a firm grip on Rudy while Ray freed himself of the arms that had pulled him away from the fight. He yelled at Rudy before he turned around, his face a mirror of his inner turmoil, and stalked away from the guys. Tim looked after Ray's retreating form and watched with a frown how Ray ignored Brad's words of concern. A moment later, Tim made to follow.

The time to pick up the pieces had come.


End file.
